Happy Birthday Matty!

Today would have been my friend Matt's 40 birthday. Matt died right after Thanksgiving last year much to the shock and grief to everyone who knew him. He's been right at the forefront of my mind today and truth be told most days since his death. I didn't know Matt as well as most of his friends knew him. I met him through the Hub-man about 11 years ago. That meeting was brilliant! Tears stream as I think about it but it was the single most memorable meetings I've had in 37 years. Let me tell you about it: My in-laws had Matt and his new wife over for dinner during my first visit to Northeast Ohio. I was terrified since it was also the first time I'd be meeting my new boyfriend's parents and I knew their initial impression of me wasn't all that great. (I may explain the reason for that in another blog). Anyway back to dinner. The MIL (mother in law) had made a beautiful roasted turkey and as we were eating she commented that it tasted 'off' not as good as usual. I thought it was great so I asked why she thought it was so bad. She said "it's a butterball and nothing tastes quite as good as a fresh turkey." "Where to you get a fresh turkey" I asked. The future FIL said "usually the backyard!" I was completely shocked and with full disclosure horrified. As a proud city girl I had never heard of someone actually raising and killing their own turkey. Matt looked over to me and asked "where do you think hamburger comes from?" With out missing a beat and with complete honesty I say "MCDONALDS!" Matt stared at me for a second then got this grin on his face. He reached over and patted my head and said "You're pretty." I laugh and cry every time I think of that story. In one exchange Matt saw me for exactly who I was in that very moment and accepted me for it. Now he was no saint and he made sure I always knew I was the "crazy California girl" but looking back there is something so comforting in knowing that he took me for exactly who I was and didn't expect anything else. Describing Matt in one word is easy. That word is TRUTH! He told the truth to anyone and everyone. Truth that was funny, painful, infuriating, loving, uncomfortable, did I say funny...? At times it made you want to punch him in the face or hug him. Now that he's gone and I'm seeing the comments his friends are making about him it keeps coming back to the fact that Matt told the truth. He would take you for exactly who you are but you had to take him right back. But if you couldn't that was ok too. He'd wait for you and when you came back it was "hey how's it going? Coming to the bonfire at the farm?" Matt I miss you more than words. My brief friendship with you changed me and you death has affected me more deeply than any other to this point. I know you're happy now and at peace so our jobs left back here is to remember you and continue your legacy. Truth.